Full Throttle Boredom

Lucy looking juicyCharlie’s Angels: Full Throttle is the most pointless movie I have ever paid money to see… and, yes, I did see Showgirls in the cinema.

Someone explain to me what the hell this movie is about — because I have no clue. Here are my questions:
  • Who is that "Leo" kid?
  • Why is there unrealistic CGI fight scenes every 35 seconds?
  • Who is Bruce Willis’ character?
  • Why did that guy from the X-Files suddenly switch sides?
  • For a followup, why did Crispin Glover switch sides?
  • Why is Drew Barrymore in Mexico?
  • Why does Demi Moore play with her gun like she’s never touched one before?
  • When did Justin Theroux get jacked? Seriously, he’s got some muscles.
  • Why does Bernie Mac turn into more and more of a caricature, as he gets more famous?
  • And yet, why was I laughing at his one-liners?
  • What are those fucking rings, and why would such low-level government workers have them?

That’s all I got right now. Oh, and one more thing: I think Lucy Liu is incredible– but I hope she has better material in Kill Bill.

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